the wicked twists of life and what i think about them

so yes I know how long it is since I blogged, but I am now aren't I? since last I have finished up Firecharmer and it is now being read by a couple of fucking brilliant persons so I hope to finish it before summer.

I have turned the respectable age of 23 and recived the single best pressent so far, a tripp to see 30STM from Anna who is now a UK recident. I wish her the best of luck, she will be one of the most important people in my life even if she moves to the moon and I never see her again so the UK isn't that far away....

The 30STM show was brilliant I was hyped on adrenaline for hours after and it is to date one of the best things I've done.

I have recently gotten half a horse and a million of books, and i'm seriously considering going back to uni as a litterature major.

on a lot sader note I found out on my birthday that my aunt has a brain tumor, they think it will be alright but we really don't know anything yet, that is a illness i really don't trust. She'll be in my thoughts for a long while ahead.

About the horse, his name is Thor and he is black and gorgeous i'll try to get a pic to share with you guys ASAP.

i'm feeling more centered than before and it is like i have a confidence to i didn't have before I also have more Ideas before and i suspect you all will hear from Goxes, Hashuri and Mansei soon among others since they are major players in one of my projects, an other project is on a boat and i'm writting a little on it each day.

Love hard stay safe and take these words with you

"The less you bet the more you lose when you win"

in my ears

heart on my sleeve

life and death to young for it all

so as i was drawing it struck me, there is so many that gets robbed of their lives. Some by brute force where noone could have seen it comming. One of them is Matthew Sheppard. He was murdered for his sexuallity.





















others die in freak acidents like Brandon lee that was shot at the set of the first crow movie.














there is active suicide like that of Jonathan Brandis a young man that could have come a long way.

or not as active suicide by various adictions one of those men are Glenn Quinn.

I admired all these men but for different reasons. some died before I really knew much about them others while I was aware. It hurts my soul to see young lives shut down like that but it makes me resolute as well it makes me want to succed and reach my dreams, so that somehow they have achived that by their death, they inspired someone to a great length. I would Love to talk to them especially Jonathan and Glenn that died by their own hand, I wish I had been a friend of theirs so that i cold atleast know I did what I could. I hope I wont have to bury any friends, but if I will have to I hope I have done all I can for them, sometimes there is just nothing that really helps, I just hope that wont happen anytime soon.

with this said, remeber this I LOVE YOU and that nothing is trivial, everything matters no matter how small, and each second could be the last so make sure you are happy with how you lived it.

in my ears
Lyke Walk dirge

first day of the year

Hi all
i was gonna post this blogg about the past decade but since blogger goes dead when i try leave me a line i'll give it to you.

how did you start your new year? I lived by my thought to live for the moment and jumped off a roof. Yes, I mean that. I shoveled snow off of Annas houses roof and after I jumped it was funny and I hae no regrets. don't need any. Now after shovling snow for hours we're heading for the sauna and then we're watching tv or a movie just relaxing. probably talk to some people cause you know it is fun. I'm drawing some charcoals too :D

got any resolutions this year? mine is normaly to not have any, but this year I wove to live full out everyday!

it is 10 years since we celebrated the start this millenium do you still remember what you did then?

I've fixed the comment malfuncion so feel free to drop a note

in my ears
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bx5dCD90vB8

soon it has ended

the year ends in about 25.5 hours and since we are getting a new start with the new year here is some tips to keep the earth a happier place

use less toiletpaper. silly but true it will save trees and make it harder to clogg up the damn thing

take a long walk everyday this will make your body get the oxygen you need, make you have more energy and if you combine it with running your erands you will save us the carbit you're driving.

eat green! more veggies will not only make you feel better but it will also make there be a bigger sortiment and you will find more favorites. this doesn't mean ekological only or become a vegetarian, just use your head, you know what is good for you. most of the dishes you know and love you can make with less protein and make it taste the same or better.

plan ahead. this will make you stress less and have more time for the things you really like.

read the newspaper online, again it saves the trees

donate money to some charity this will help the world and you will feel great about dong something about the problems, not just being a part of them.

seize the day. enjoy the time you are here precious little things enjoy them, wou will never know when it all ends.

make only one resolution, and make it a good one, don't the old lose weight or stop smoking thing make it one about experience even if it is to dare to go on a rollercoaster for the first time do that, see a consert, go shoping, ditch class something that you will look back and be happy you did.

ALL NEW ME!!!

my hair is now remade as you can see, after the odd 6 hours in a hairdresers chair... I've looked kinda funny during the process got some shots of that too, there will be two bloggs up this year that i am sure of, one for christmas and a special at new years eve about the past decade.

For the moment i'm doing the dishes (the dishwasher is) and my brothers have gotten this years christmas tree. beside that I draw, I'll give you an example at a later blog, might do one with just stuff i doodled down. If you have a pic of someone that is pretty I'd love to get a link for it as i'm going a thousand and one charcoal pictures.

My middle brother offered me an intresting insight today one of my pics sucks majorly, and i was being frustrated over it, then he asks me "have you thought of that you might not be done with it yet? so I might work it some more, if it gets over worked it wont matter anny way.

So til then HAPPY 4th ADVENT! take care and make sure you have a nice hollieday.

In my ears http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=62vycv57ORw (song starts a good 30-40 secs in)

matters of the heart and soul

Today I found out a few things i didn't want to find out and I have tried not to think of for a long while

1 My uncle almost died, I don't have the details yet but aparently it was a workrelated accident. He is still among us and i am happy for that, I really am. I am extreemly proud of my family, I want you all to know this, no matter what they have done of their lives or will do of them I bellive it will be for the right reasons, or atleast the right reasons to them. I wont say I allways agree with them, cause I honestly don't but that doesn't matter. As long as they can say they did what they bellive in, and know when to say they were wrong they live up to my praise. I want this said in light of what happened today, I want them all to know that I am proud, imensly so, and that I love them, for who they are.

2 I could so easily fall for this dear friend of mine, and I mean easily. I adore her as my friend she is really cool, and she gets where I come from most of the time, she is fuckin
gorgeous and she doesn't know it. I love her as my friend and I feel that I can trust her. you see all the good things here? bad things? well she lives in an other freaking country, I haven't really meet her and did I mention she is straight? Big valid bad things, still my heart wants me to let it go and I'm so scared i'll give in one day and that my heart will get broken. I don't want that I want her to be my friend, I want no I need her to talk to her, I email her when i'm not on msn.

I miss her when i haven't talked to her in a while... you can tell by the sound of this how close it is.... so what sould I do? i dunno... cutie tell me what you think?

on a lighter note let me tell you the story about the bight orange hair of mine, my hairdresser messed up so my hair is a mess, and i need to go back tomorrow and fix it, but I do have a pic the light is off so you can't rally see how bad it was but it is still pretty neat

I also have done my christmassly duty and made gingerbreads! Christmas is comming and i think we'll be done in time

In my ears http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y5HA-QFLJzg

oooooooo lookielooo

So i'm currently in the process of finishing up a book and a colection of poetry, the later is in dire need of ilustarions i'm working on that.... i'm also working fullstop, and taking german classes in school, and making christmas at mums... her husband is in a cast gain and wont work for month, i hope i survive christmas cause i'm seriously not looking forward to be there when he gets cranky... although mum says she'll kick him out if he wont behave himself towards all of us kids, thankfully i'm among that else i'd be screwed for real....

nothing much is going on elseways, my fridge defrosted itself even though it can't i freaked out but it solved it self.

GO BUY "THIS IS WAR"!!!!!! I'm on it and it is a GREAT record really the best of the year, and with those that got out this year that i love that says a lot, i'm really proud to be a part of it.

in my ears

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ka9LVev40ME